Here, for your viewing pleasure, the finest of the Adrian Beltre facts
* Adrian Beltre has never hit into a fielder’s choice. The choice is up to him.
* Adrian Beltre hasn’t made 15 errors. The official scorers have.
* The reason Adrian Beltre throws flat-footed is to slow down the rotation of the earth.
* NASA solved its early problems by having Adrian Beltre throw the capsules into space.
* With the roof open at Rogers Centre, the sun isn’t beating down on Adrian Beltre. Adrian Beltre is beating down on the sun.
* Carl Everett thinks that Adrian Beltre is made up, just like the dinosaurs and outer space.
* Adrian Beltre doesn’t like anybody touching his head because he’s afraid he’ll break their hands.
* Even Chuck Norris is afraid to touch Adrian Beltre’s head.
* Even Adrian Beltre’s helmet is afraid to touch his head.
* The Big Bang was a result of God touching Adrian Beltre’s head.
* Adrian Beltre is the reason McDonald’s discontinued the McRibs.
* Adrian Beltre once watched “Delta Force” on TV. Chuck Norris woke up the next day with three broken ribs.
* Adrian Beltre is the reason baseballs need stitches.
* It took Adrian Beltre only four swings to demolish the old Yankee Stadium.
* Adrian Beltre only appeals to umpires on checked swings so they can feel important.
* Customs officials will have to show Adrian Beltre their passports at the airport tonight.
* When Adrian Beltre does a postgame interview, he asks the questions.
* Adrian Beltre doesn’t wear spikes. The ground knows the only way to survive is not to let go.
The finest of the lot;
* Adrian Beltre pulled a ball to the opposite field.
* Scott Boras is actually an Adrian Beltre client.
* Adrian Beltre won Connect Four in three moves.