Mike Bell is the Atlanta area radio jock who, last night, made several derogatory comments on Twitter about 2 time Olympic Medalist and ESPN baseball commentator, Jessica Mendoza. He has since been suspended from his job for 2 weeks, and has issued an apologetic statement.
Why do we bring this up? Well, this blog is delighted to exclusively reveal a page from his daily diary, just for you!
Whilst the timing of this diary excerpt is perhaps manufactured somewhat, the content is 100% accurate. The details are all actual things. In many cases, I wish I was making them up, however, they are all real.
7:00 am - What you got, Thursday?! Start the day with some Lucky Charms and the highlights from last night's game. By game I mean, last night's Lingerie football. That's right, Im'ma start my day with some women in lingerie playing football. Depressing? Bite your tongue no! This is America, this is wonderful. I am eating cereal in my boxers watching scantily clad women embarrass themselves on National TV because I can.
7:27 am - So this is great, I'm reading some article about something serious on the CBS website, and, you know those little click-bait 'articles' down at the bottom of the page, well there's a picture of a babe in a bikini and the article is titled; Most NFL Players have Hot Wives - Here are the top 27. It's a slideshow! Bingo! This is going to be a great 7 minutes.
7:34 am - Better do some research for today's show. Where to start. How about one of the most popular sports sites in the USA, Barstool Sports? The great thing about BS is that they have sports, sure, but they also have a quick-link to their 'Girls' area. This is home to 'Smokeshow of the day', basically a daily woman, normally in little or no clothing. 'Guess that underboob' is a fun recurring article but my favorite is 'Guess that ass'. You just aren't living if you're not staring at a part of a woman's body trying to figure out who owns it. On a sports website. That's advertised on many mainstream sites, and is very popular among young American men. BS is just the best! Actual 'articles' about women use any picture of that woman in next to nothing. The comments section on these 'articles' are the really great part. If you want to take a little peek into the empty, darkest areas of the human race, checkout the comments section on a Barstool 'article'. Barstool Sports, molding the minds of our brightest and finest!
10:00 am - Slow day at work. We're running a competition where the prize is an NFL jersey of a prominent player. We talked about it for a while in the office and came up with the following list of awesome NFL players, being paid to play football right now as we speak.
Ray McDonald and Chris Cook, Tony McDaniel and Kevin Williams, Brandon Marshall and Santonio Holmes, Greg Hardy, Dez Bryant, Erik Walden , Donte Whitner, Randy Starks and Frostee Rucker (oddly enough, these guys have all been arrested for domestic violence or related charges since 2005).
I have the deciding vote, and I select Greg Hardy. You might remember Hardy from the 2 month long NFL investigation that found that there was "sufficient credible evidence" that Hardy had engaged in conduct which "violated NFL policies in multiple respects and with aggravating circumstances." The league's investigation had concluded that Hardy used physical force in at least four instances, including placing his hands around the victim's neck with enough pressure to leave visible marks.
He's playing for the Dallas Cowboys this weekend. He's being paid by them to play football, and represent them on National TV.
12:00 pm - Lunch time! Where better to have my lunch than your local Hooters. The same Hooters that's advertised on prime time shows, complete with those ladies walking around in skin-tight outfits. America truly is the greatest country in the World, where else can you drool over your chicken wings while you simultaneously drool over a college student in extremely sexist clothing who has to be nice to you so you give her a decent tip, as she's only being paid minimum wage by the restaurant, who are making millions annually because cretins like you enjoy the demeaning act of being waited on by women in idiotic costumes. Makes you feel like a Big Man. Yeah, gimme those chicken wings, baby, and make sure you smile at me while you do it. Hooters!! It's a real thing! I'm not making it up. It's a real thing.
2:00 pm - Back to work. Well, when I say work, I mean Googling the words 'NFL Cheerleader'. By accident I press 'web' instead of 'images' after typing those words in, and I end up wanting to scratch my own eye out after reading this overly PC article by some stuffy clown!
Why do we bring this up? Well, this blog is delighted to exclusively reveal a page from his daily diary, just for you!
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| The greatest country in the World - unless you consider how deeply embedded sexism is in its sports. But hey, whatever. |
Whilst the timing of this diary excerpt is perhaps manufactured somewhat, the content is 100% accurate. The details are all actual things. In many cases, I wish I was making them up, however, they are all real.
7:00 am - What you got, Thursday?! Start the day with some Lucky Charms and the highlights from last night's game. By game I mean, last night's Lingerie football. That's right, Im'ma start my day with some women in lingerie playing football. Depressing? Bite your tongue no! This is America, this is wonderful. I am eating cereal in my boxers watching scantily clad women embarrass themselves on National TV because I can.
7:27 am - So this is great, I'm reading some article about something serious on the CBS website, and, you know those little click-bait 'articles' down at the bottom of the page, well there's a picture of a babe in a bikini and the article is titled; Most NFL Players have Hot Wives - Here are the top 27. It's a slideshow! Bingo! This is going to be a great 7 minutes.
7:34 am - Better do some research for today's show. Where to start. How about one of the most popular sports sites in the USA, Barstool Sports? The great thing about BS is that they have sports, sure, but they also have a quick-link to their 'Girls' area. This is home to 'Smokeshow of the day', basically a daily woman, normally in little or no clothing. 'Guess that underboob' is a fun recurring article but my favorite is 'Guess that ass'. You just aren't living if you're not staring at a part of a woman's body trying to figure out who owns it. On a sports website. That's advertised on many mainstream sites, and is very popular among young American men. BS is just the best! Actual 'articles' about women use any picture of that woman in next to nothing. The comments section on these 'articles' are the really great part. If you want to take a little peek into the empty, darkest areas of the human race, checkout the comments section on a Barstool 'article'. Barstool Sports, molding the minds of our brightest and finest!
10:00 am - Slow day at work. We're running a competition where the prize is an NFL jersey of a prominent player. We talked about it for a while in the office and came up with the following list of awesome NFL players, being paid to play football right now as we speak.
Ray McDonald and Chris Cook, Tony McDaniel and Kevin Williams, Brandon Marshall and Santonio Holmes, Greg Hardy, Dez Bryant, Erik Walden , Donte Whitner, Randy Starks and Frostee Rucker (oddly enough, these guys have all been arrested for domestic violence or related charges since 2005).
I have the deciding vote, and I select Greg Hardy. You might remember Hardy from the 2 month long NFL investigation that found that there was "sufficient credible evidence" that Hardy had engaged in conduct which "violated NFL policies in multiple respects and with aggravating circumstances." The league's investigation had concluded that Hardy used physical force in at least four instances, including placing his hands around the victim's neck with enough pressure to leave visible marks.
He's playing for the Dallas Cowboys this weekend. He's being paid by them to play football, and represent them on National TV.
12:00 pm - Lunch time! Where better to have my lunch than your local Hooters. The same Hooters that's advertised on prime time shows, complete with those ladies walking around in skin-tight outfits. America truly is the greatest country in the World, where else can you drool over your chicken wings while you simultaneously drool over a college student in extremely sexist clothing who has to be nice to you so you give her a decent tip, as she's only being paid minimum wage by the restaurant, who are making millions annually because cretins like you enjoy the demeaning act of being waited on by women in idiotic costumes. Makes you feel like a Big Man. Yeah, gimme those chicken wings, baby, and make sure you smile at me while you do it. Hooters!! It's a real thing! I'm not making it up. It's a real thing.
2:00 pm - Back to work. Well, when I say work, I mean Googling the words 'NFL Cheerleader'. By accident I press 'web' instead of 'images' after typing those words in, and I end up wanting to scratch my own eye out after reading this overly PC article by some stuffy clown!
NFL cheerleading? Nothing short of sexist.
The constant battering ram of 'Hottest cheerleader!' slide shows on the openly sexist, rape-cajoling 'sports' websites aimed at American youth is mind bendingly disturbing. If you are in doubt that NFL cheerleading is sexist, just do yourself a favour. Do some due-diligence and have a little look at how NFL cheerleaders are presented to us by sports websites. Sports Illustrated take the stoic approach, their Hugh Heffner like styling is pathetic but, mostly, at least not overtly pornographic or aggressive.
Onto the 'harder' stuff. Have a look at the following if you think NFL cheerleading isn't a pursuit hijacked by sexism in the USA. Websites cajole us to marvel at their own slideshow of the NFL's 'hottest' cheerleader. It's absolute stone cold sexism and it has become so embedded in US society that we don't even see it for what it is any more.
I hate myself and I want to die! I wanted to see NFL cheerleaders in demeaning costumes, I didn't want a lecture!
4:00 pm - Like I said, slow day. Some chick at work accuses the sports sites in America of being sexist. She challenges us that we can't get 10 clicks into any of the top 10 US sports websites without seeing something sexist. No way! Just to shut Tits McGee up we accept the challenge.
- Yahoo sports - 1 click, Front page. A link to the 'hottest female cosplay costumes'.
- ESPN - 10 clicks, nothing sexist!
- Bleacher Report - I am as shocked as you are. 10 clicks, and, nothing!
- CBS sports - 2 clicks. Extremely sexist click-bait articles in a major article.
- Sports Illustrated - 1 click. Front page. Lots of boobies here! Awesome!
- NBC Sports - 10 clicks, nothing at all. Clean as a whistle.
- SB Nation - 7 clicks, took a while, but we found some cheesecake after 7 clicks.
- Fox Sports - 10 clicks, and, what the hell, nothing?! I am as stunned as you.
- Rant Sports - 4 clicks, standard sexist click-bait articles.
- Deadspin - 10 clicks, and nothing. Whatever.
5:00 pm - Yawn. Really, just a slow day here in the heart of the USA. Time to go home, but Im'ma gonna stop at Hooters and ogle some more women in tight clothing serving me beer, before hitting the sofa to watch some Lingerie Football, and I'll end my night surfing NFL cheerleader slide shows on any one of our great American sports websites. Because this is America. The greatest country in the World.
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| Not demeaning at all. Gosh, no. |
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