World Cup Wednesday: Get your own Brazilian name and England's problems

Wait a second, there are no World Cup games today? What? Seriously? Well, time to get in touch with your loved ones again I suppose, catch up on soap operas and maybe check out the new series of 'Entourage'. Back to work Friday with the quarter finals.

In the meantime, fancy getting your own Brazilian like name? Then check this out.



Meanwhile, ‘Engurland’, what to make of the spectacular English demise. We all knew they were going to crash out amidst great drama, but could anyone have predicted this? Schadenfruede is a terrible, lazy and ugly thing but I would have to raise my hand like a Mexican defender against Argentina, and admit guilt to committing nuclear levels of same on Sunday when England were battered by the brilliant Germans.

Thing is, much as I rejoiced in the over hyped English team being destroyed, it is actually interesting to see where they are going wrong.

Item A on the agenda, their own arrogance. Pre tournament England’s sporting media hypes their national side up to the extent that anything other than lifting the trophy is seen as an abject failure. The English sports media is inherently blind to how limited their football team is. Every single paper, every single online site of English extraction selected their own boys to beat the Germans on Sunday. It was almost entirely impossible to find a dissenting view.

There is an enormous disconnect between the English media and reality when it comes to team England.

We all saw the games. Germany were superb, England stumbled to come second in a group with Algeria in it. How did the English pundits decide that Fabio’s eleven would beat the Germans? Pure unadulterated arrogance.

Secondly, the manager is not the problem. Try this figure on for size. 71.4% - No England manager has managed a better win percentage than Fabio Capello in international tournaments and qualifiers. He is a manager with a proven record of success. Albeit not at International level yet, but a stunning record of 9 league titles in 16 attempts (including Juventus of course) should speak for itself. It is obvious that at he knows what he's doing.

It would make more sense to look at the players and their inflated reputations. Frank Lampard? Decent attacking midfielder, who scores plenty of goals in an advanced role for Chelsea, whilst surrounded by top class talent. My feeling is England are expecting one thing and Lampard is providing another. The man they ask to win the ball back, Gareth Barry, honestly, can you say you have seen him dominate a game this side of 2010? I know I haven’t. Then there is Emile Heskey. How many of the Quarter finalists would have Heskey up front for them? Zero. Not one. You could argue that not many of the original 32 would. He is completely and utterly useless at International level. England chose to leave the second top scorer in the much vaunted English Premiership at home (Darren Bent, who might have provided a spark for England), while taking Heskey, who John terry could beat in a race.

Wayne Rooney? I have always had a theory that Rooney would start to struggle with his body type as the years went on, and it appears I may have been right. Watching Rooney stumble around the South African pitches all red faced and flustered, was nothing short of embarrassing. That is the cream of the English crop? Really?

Once again, pre tournament you could not have scripted the English demise with any more panache and flair. They are spectacularly incompetent in terms of International football, and boy is it fun to watch.


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FIFA plays Ostrich, and does it so well.

Clap, clap, clap. Well done FIFA. You just go and stick your heads in the sand like the collective, cowardly Ostriches you are. This is how the official FIFA website describes 'that' incident in the tumultuous England/Germany showdown yesterday in Africa.

''Meetings between these two sides often provide talking points and this one's came 60 seconds later when Lampard's shot from the edge of the box struck the underside of the crossbar and bounced down, with the referee ruling the ball had not crossed the goalline.''

That's it. Nothing else at all. No pictures, no comment that the ball clearly had crossed the line. But hey, we shouldn't be shocked, right? This is the same organisation that thrust its head in the sand and basically left Thierry Henry hanging in the wind as France handled their way past Ireland in the playoffs.

In a way, it's almost reassuring to see at least FIFA are stubbornly consistent. So far no special dispensation is being made or shown despite the fact this match was played between two enormous footballing super powers.

Imagine, such an enormous incident reduced to one completely inauspicious paragraph on the official site of the tournament. Feels like Stalin's Russia, or something you would read in the North Korean Daily Star, right under a section about North Korea beating Brazil.

More sinister is that any mention of the incident has been stricken from the comments section. They must have someone trawling through all the comments looking for any reference to the embarrassing goal that never was, and deleting said comments like some sort of World War Two censor.

Seriously, where are we, 1950's Hungary? This is completely embarrassing. Sports fans in the States are watching this and scratching their heads and asking, 'This is the biggest tournament in the World, really?'

So where does yesterday's game leave us? The English are left to write soul searching (if brilliant) pieces on where England has gone wrong on the International stage. Happy Irish fans scream 'See?! I told you!' pointing like lunatics at the screen as Lampard's shot cannoned in off the bar, only for FIFA to shrug, turn their noses up and say 'This is our game, we're not changing'. Did I mention those Irish fans were on their way to the bookmaker to collect on their German bets? Germany, they move on to tackle Argentina in a match that doesn't need any hype, it sells itself as a potentially brilliant encounter.

FIFA? Business as usual at FIFA. At this very moment some FIFA lower level scrub is busy deleting comments on the official game report comment section about the goal that never was.

Much like the big French handball, they just don't want to know about it.

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Achtung!! Germany and the Ewing theory alive and well! Achtung!!

Allow me to toot my own Vuvuzela, if I may...taken from this

Group D
Germany
In the States most sports fans know what the Ewing Theory is. In Europe and the rest of the World it’s still an unknown description of a phenomenon. However, it could very well be applied beautifully here. First of all, to its creator, Bill ‘The Sports Guy’ Simmons for a definition of ‘The Ewing Theory’ taken from this piece.

What's the best example of the Ewing Theory?
That's easy. During the '99 NBA Playoffs, Ewing tore an Achilles tendon during the second game of the Eastern finals against Indiana. With Ewing finished for the playoffs and nobody else on the Knicks who could handle Rik Smits, the series seemed like a foregone conclusion. As an added bonus, since Ewing himself was involved, that made this the ultimate test of the Ewing Theory; in fact, I e-mailed Dave that week to say, "This is the greatest test yet."
Dave's return e-mail oozed with confidence, as he told me in no uncertain terms, "Ewing's injury is the best thing that ever could have happened to the Knicks -- they're definitely making the Finals now."
So what happened? The Knicks won three of the next four and advanced to the NBA Finals for only the second time in 26 years

How does this apply to Germany? If you haven’t already guessed, Germany’s talismanic Captain and resident Matt Damon look alike, Michael Ballack, is out of the World Cup due to injury. And boom goes the dynamite. Germany? The ’99 New York Knicks. Like the Knicks, they will probably fall short after a better than expected tournament.

Just a great day at the World Cup yesterday

That Landon Donovan goal, huge. Absolutely huge, on so many levels. First things first, that goal catapults Donovan from ‘big fish in a small pond’ to legitimate US superstar. He has been doing it consistently for years for team USA, however his sensational game winning goal yesterday now puts him right up there with the top athlete superstars in the USA. Deservedly so, too. His goal was simple enough, the lead up play and the ‘poachers instincts’ to be following up for the rebound were things you can’t teach.

Donovan deserves to be enjoyed at the highest level of football. He has had a terrific half season at Everton in the English Premiership, and can definitely lead the USA past an athletic but kind of punchless Ghanaian side.

For the USA on a whole, hopefully that goal serves as an impetus to shove soccer even higher up the rankings in the States. Too long it has wallowed behind the ‘big three’ of NFL, NBA and MLB. Maybe Donovan’s goal will be the catalyst that drives soccer to new, great heights in the States.

Meanwhile, believe it or not, England are actually favourites to bear Germany in their next match, their first in the knockout rounds. England are currently best priced at 6/4 whilst the Germans are 9/4. These numbers may be skewed somewhat by the English betting public, however it is amazing to see the Germans actually underdogs to England’s shockingly mediocre eleven.

Germany has quality, pace and talent all over the park, at every position. They are a forward thinking side, infused with youth. They survived a very tough group, seeing off the challenge of the Serbs (sure, they lost to them but should have beaten them handily and they progress, not their Serbian rivals), handling Ghana with ease and absolutely annihilating the Australians.

England, meanwhile, struggled mightily to finish runners up in a group that most said was the easiest in the World Cup. Ireland played Algeria before the finals in a friendly and absolutely destroyed them 3-0. Make no mistake, they were a limited side. England’s draw against them was nothing short of pathetic. Bear in mind, the States hit the woodwork a couple of times against the same foe and probably should have run out easy 2-0 or 3-0 winners. Slovenia? No great shakes at all.

The body of Germany’s work in this World Cup is far more impressive than that of England.

Give me that 9/4 any day of the week.

Watch out England, the Panzers are coming.

I hate Brazil.

I can not wait to root against Brazil. Last night, next match, next round. Whatever. This is a major about turn for me. I used to love Brazil, and their ’02 tournament win was a thing of poignant, swashbuckling beauty. That Brazilian team was full of rogues and pirates like Ronaldo who had somewhat murky private lives and still produced football of sublime quality.

The current incarnation? Something of a schmaltzy, syrupy, tasteless mess.

Two major issues. Item 'A' on the agenda, Brazil may be the dirtiest team in World Football. Sneaky dirty. Watch them play, they are absolute hatchet men 30 yards from goal. Their own players freely admit it, too; As Felipe Melo puts it: "If I have to commit a foul, I will. If I have to get a yellow card, I will. It's better than conceding a goal."

What really makes the stomach churn is their ridiculous play acting. They dive, flop and roll around the floor better than any NBA player has ever done. Watching Lucio play is nothing short of sick inducing. He is a completely pathetic individual on the football field. A big, strong man, he falls down as if shot in the face by a crossbow any time a player even nudges him. He is a complete and utter disgrace, and is validated by weak FIFA referees who give him free kick after free kick following his acting displays. And that's just one player. The entire Brazilian squad is well versed in acting, or simulating, as FIFA call it.

Brazil of course are not a one dimensional side. They can come at you with a variety of artistic flops and dives, or they can ram religion down your throat like no other.

The celebrations after Brazil beat the USA in the Confederations cup final were like a particularly psychotic sect throwing a particularly scary party. Why oh why do Brazil think it is important, no, essential, to ram their religious beliefs down our throats? After every important tournament win, or even after individual goals, the current Brazilian squad seems to feel it essential to rip off their jersey to reveal a t-shirt with crayon writing a five year old would be embarrassed by featuring headlines such as ‘Jesus loves me!’ or ‘I score for Jesus!’ Okay I made the latter up but, the religious fervor that Brazil have been championing lately is nothing short of disgusting.

Before you say ‘each to their own’ – that’s the entire point, each is not being allowed their own here, instead Brazil are using a World stage to inappropriately and aggressively deliver their religious message. Ask yourself, if a team all removed their shirts to reveal pro-scientology messages scrawled on them, would you find that appetizing? How about if an African team triumphs and starts screaming verses from the Koran at bewildered members of the international sporting press?

I used to enjoy watching Kaka and Brazil play.

Now, I can not wait for that smug, patronising and arrogant grin to get wiped off their faces by a team of vagabond scoundrels at the World Cup. Please God, Allah, Buddha and the Force, let there be a Portland ‘Jailblazzers’ team of under dogs out there waiting to take Brazil down.

Sanctimonious, much?

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Rick Reilly (ESPN) tries a World Cup hatchet job: and fails miserably.

Is there anything uglier in writing than someone who knows nothing at all about a particular sport trying to write a complete hatchet job on said venture?

Wherever possible I try my best to avoid reading Rick Reilly. I am sure he is a top notch gentleman (and all signs point towards that), it’s just he writes like a pastor delivering a particularly pedantic, preachy sermon on a lazy Sunday afternoon. His latest target? The World Cup.

One of the major problems with Reilly’s hatchet job on the tournament is, it shows he has absolutely no interest or knowledge in soccer whatsoever. There are plenty of ESPN writers who are pretty new to the game, but have made some effort to get to know the nuances of the World’s favourite game. Reilly? Not a chance.

Naturally he starts his assault with a complaint about the Vuvuzela. Already dealt with that, so let’s move on. Next up, a four year old like attack on the bibs substitutes have to wear, so that when they warm up they aren’t confused with the action. Reilly says ‘They're very purple and dorky.’ I would imagine he put all his journalistic efforts into that one.

One of the most idiotic attacks he makes is on goal keeper gloves. Reilly calls them the ‘’ The Twinkie-fingered gloves goalkeepers wear.’’ Really only one answer to this one, Reilly should stand in nets and face a couple of shots off the boot of Wayne Rooney. A couple of broken fingers later it would be interesting to see if he thought the gloves were still too big.

What is most glaring there is, it is absolutely clear Reilly has never faced a shot in anger in soccer, and has no concept at all how fast the ball travels and how hard a shot can be to stop.

How can you take a shot at goal keeper gloves though, seriously? Are the mitts baseball players wear frivolous? It’s basically the same thing. Are the over sized gloves the NHL goalies wear that funny? Again, basically the same thing. Reilly seems to be really stretching to make any kind of a point here.

Amazingly for his fourth ‘point’ he goes back to the Vuvuzela. Completely unsure if he is trying to be funny by making the point twice or if his editor just missed this, however it is a bad sign if you are left thinking too hard about whether someone is trying to be funny or not.

Reilly than takes a shot at diving, or flopping, and makes this point; ‘’ We live in the U.S., where hockey players pop their eye back into their socket without missing a shift.’’ That’s true, however you also live in a country where they play NBA basketball, a game with so much diving and flopping your average La Liga player (the home of the flop) would blush. Give me a break. The flopping (from both sides) in the NBA finals is at Def Con one disease contagion level. It’s absolutely pathetic! So before you start the inane, jingoistic and ugly ‘we live in a country where..’ have a look at your own sports, particularly the dive/flop happy NBA.

‘We live in a country where…’ are you for real Rick Reilly? Are you writing the script for a particularly asinine advertisement for Dodge trucks or something?

Reilly then has a pop at Yellow cards j0king ‘..as though the little yellow card has some kind of superpower.’’ Well, it does, get two of them and you are watching the rest of the match on a TV in the club house. So, yes, they certainly do have some kind of superpower. Perhaps Reilly did not know this, but if that’s the case he should have been hammering out his next tear-at-your-heart-strings piece on some cat being stuck in a tree instead of writing about soccer.

Reilly mails in the last three points, two don’t even bear mentioning and his last one is, that’s right, you guessed it, the Vuvuzela again. Nice work Rick, how much were you paid for that piece?

The major problem for Reilly, apart from the fact that he is either a lazy writer or shouldn’t have tackled something he doesn’t know anything at all about, is that the US sporting public is slowly getting to know soccer. The difference in the last four years is incredible. The US sporting media writing you read on soccer is improving in leaps and bounds.

This means that Reilly’s lazy and worst of all singularly unfunny ‘article’ really stands out like a sore thumb

Thankfully Reilly very rarely tackles soccer (as his shown by his almost arrogant lack of knowledge on the subject) and thus will return next time to tackle more serious topics, like how a recent rom-com flick made him feel, deep inside, or how Tiger can make himself a better person (he actually wrote that last one).

Until you learn something about the game, Rick, just avoid writing about soccer. You only make yourself and ESPN look stupid otherwise.

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Vuvuzela

Enough already with the Vuvuzela bashing! Unbelievably racist complaints billowing forth from European outlets, like the last few remains of the stench of colonialism. That is how they watch football in South Africa. They like to blow their horn! The complaints are nothing short of inane. Do you think African fans enjoy seeing pot bellied, ugly, over weight English ‘fans’ taking their shirts off when watching Premiership football? Do fans around the world call angrily en-masse to complain about the aggressive, racist and often homophobic chants that spew forth from English football terraces, clearly audible during TV coverage? I know which football culture I find more attractive! Ill take the colourful, friendly and vociferous African support over, sadly, the majority of English football support, even including the Vuvuzela.



If anything, I can already find myself getting used to the incessant drone of the Vuvuzela in the background as the matches play on.

Have to admit, I kind of like it.

Play on, Vuvuzela man, play on!

apparently, not much has changed...

Tuesday 15th June World Cup recommendations

I know you are not allowed gamble in the States, you can own a gun but you can’t place an adult wager, but, just in case any of you know how to get some hard earned dollars on the games in the big tournament, here you go.

Today’s action.
New Zealand v Slovakia
Keep an eye on Marek Hamsik of Slovakia in the early game. He plays for Napoli in the Italian league and will be the classiest player on the pitch, from either side. You can back him at 7-1 for first goal or at 13/5 to score at any time. The latter appeals as he should get plenty of chances. Slovakia should be too good for the Kiwis, the latter having lost to none other than Fiji in the Oceania playoff section pre World Cup, so Slovakia -1 at 6/4 appeals somewhat


Portugal v Ivory Coast
At a glance, the Ivory Coast should struggle against a European ‘power house’ with Ronaldo in the side, and with Didier Drogba injured and probably not playing. Look a bit deeper into the two teams however and the situation gets more complicated. The Ivory Coast is littered with superb, big, physical players who all love a tackle. Yaya Toure and his brother Kole, Arsenal’s Eboue (who came on in leaps and bounds in ‘09/’10 and Didier Zakora will all be well up for the task. Meanwhile Portugal will be relying on a slow, ageing midfield, of which one of their own supporters said this;

Weakest link: Midfield. Two of Raul Meireles, Tiago, Pedro Mendes and Deco are likely to be on the pitch at all times and it is difficult to see any of these getting into any other top international side.

Hardly a ringing endorsement! Remember, Portugal struggled mightily to make their way to this World Cup, only getting through in a playoff after having a terrible group stage, by their standards. Be brave and back the power packed mighty Elephants, Ivory Coast, at 12/5. KoloToure used to get amongst the goals for Arsenal and you can have him at 17/1 to score at any time.

Brazil v North Korea
Only once so far in this tournament have we seen a team open up and take an inferior side to pieces, step forward Germany, who’s Blitz Krieg on an over matched Australian side was a thing to behold. Well, we may witness the same again tonight, as North Korea take a time out from playing sides like

Probably the most interesting thing about the North Korean’s is their most popular fans chant; "The glory of a wise people, Brought up in a culture brilliant, With a history five millennia long, Let us devote our bodies and minds, To supporting this Korea forever." Doesn’t have the same ring to it as ‘Beat LA!’ however, stirring stuff, indeed. Brazil have the ability and the class to go pretty mental here, and help themselves to a glut of goals. FIFA have, as they like to do, set this up deliberately as a late opening sequence ‘glamour’ game and you can bet everything will be in Brazil’s favour as they look to open their tournament with a bang. No messing here, get on Brazil -2 at even money and watch the goals fly in (hopefully)

Recommendations:

• Marek Hamsik anytime goalscorer v New Zealand - 13/5
• Slovakia -1 v New Zealand - 6/4
• Ivory Coast to beat Portugal - 12/5
• KoloToure anytime goalscorer - 17/1
• Brazil -2 to beat North Korea - evens

Crazy Tuesday treble

• Slovakia to win 2-0 5/1
• Ivory Coast to win to nil (win and concede no goals) 4/1
• Brazil to score four or more goals 15-8

€10 treble would return: €715

Contracts. The Darrelle Revis and Cesc Fabregas story

I feel this morning like I am missing something. First Arsenal player Cesc Fabregas and now Jets loudmouth corner back Darrelle Revis. What is it about these people? Basically, it would appear both have signed contracts that they no longer wish to honour.

Just to take a step back and look at this from another angle. Say you, Joe Punter, are hired in a new job, some kind of random thing, 9-5 desk jockey kind of thing. So, day one, you sign a shiny new contract, detailing your employment conditions, your pay and such. They lock you up to a two year contract, for example, and everyone leaves the office happy.

After say, four months, it turns out you are really good at your job. You are one of the best in your field.

This is the crucial point, what happens next? Do you continue to work hard and provide good results and work towards getting a great raise and a new contract, when your contract runs out? Or do you get all Darrelle Revis on your employer and demand your contract is ripped up and you are paid differently.

All-Pro cornerback Darrelle Revis said he will attend the Jets’ mandatory minicamp next week despite his frustration over the slow nature of his contract negotiations. Revis said yesterday he is being patient, but still wants to be the highest-paid player at his position. He is due to make $1 million in the fourth season of his six-year rookie deal.

What is missing here? Darrelle, you signed a contract! That is supposed to mean something! You are supposed to be good at your job!! Don’t even get me started on Fabregas. The Spanish midfielder has a contract in place with Arsenal to 2015. He is paid very handsomely to do a job, which he does well. Everybody should be happy, right? Wrong! Fabregas will not put an end to the rumours that he wants to move to Barcelona.

If I was Arsene Wenger, the Arsenal manager, I would print out a copy of Cesc’s contract, paste it up on his locker, and remind him that training it at 8 am the next morning. If he has a problem with that, stick him on the bench and tell him to get ready for some reserve team football.

Good God almighty, why do we let these spoilt brats away with this kind of thing? If I walked in to my boss tomorrow and said I want a new contract, he would laugh me right back to the desk I came from.

Honour your contracts, people!! Or is your signature worth muck?

T-Minus not too long to the 'My kids gotta eat, man!' speech

So, can we shut up about trading Papelbon now?

In baseball, more so than other sports, there is always a fan that thinks he knows more than the manager of his or her favourite club. ‘Bench this guy or that guy, start this fella or that fella’ whatever it is, everybody has an opinion on how to put a Major League ball club on the diamond.

In Boston, it is taken to a whole new level.

In Ye Olde Towne, they don’t tell Tito how to run the team, as much as every Joe Punter on the street actually tells the Red Sox front office how to run the entire ball club. ‘’Lineup changes? Screw that! I’ll tell you exactly who we need to trade for to get this club going!’’

It is entirely moronic.

Last night was a great example of why the big mouthed 'Uber' fans should stick to their day jobs. For weeks, in fact for months now, with young Infernoballer Daniel Bard throwing absolute darts, there has been plenty of chatter as to how Boston should trade their All Star closer Jonathon Papelbon. One blown save all season, and people are ready to send him off to inevitably haunt Boston down the road. Thankfully the front office aren’t idiots, like many, many of their fans.

Bard is no doubt going to be a superb closer in the future. He has the stuff, and appears to be a willing learner who will not be afraid to attack the strike zone in clutch situations down the road. However, in one corner you have a guy who is almost the perfect closer, Papelbon is fearless, has Grade A+ ‘stuff’ and has that little bit of, for want of a better description, mental instability that is essential to the modern closer. Bard? We have no clue yet.

It's baseball. It is a slow game. It doesn't lend itself well to reactionary, knee jerk management or front office decisions. It takes time to develop, even a guy who throws 100mph. Last night Bard blew what would have been a great come back win for the Red Sox. No guilt, no shame, he will bounce back, he is young and on a learning curve. These things happen in baseball.

The people that should be asking themselves a question or two, are the loudmouth clowns who were baying for Papelbon to be traded in the last few weeks.

You guys still want to stick to that statement this morning? Really?

''shut up and enjoy the games, I'm in charge!''

Something got me thinking...

Well, Stephen Strasburg's sensational Major League debut got me thinking. Watching the young lad overwhelm completely mismatched Pirates hitters brought back memories of another devastating rookie start way back when.

As Mr Burns's monkeys wrote; 'It was the best of times; it was the blurst of times'

Back when Smoking was banned in all California bars and restaurants. Back when Paula Jones accused U.S. President Bill Clinton of sexual harassment. Back when the Winter Olympics were held in Nagano, Japan. It was a time when Titanic crushed the opposition, winning a record 11 Oscars. And perhaps most importantly of all, back when the Food and Drug Administration approved Viagra for use as a treatment for male impotence, the first pill to be approved for this condition in the United States.

Good times.

In case you haven't guessed as yet, the year was 1998 and a young rookie called Kerry Wood, well, he went and did something special. In what was only his his fifth career start, on May 6, he threw a one-hit, no walk, 20-strikeout shutout against the Houston Astros, tying Roger Clemens' record for strikeouts in a nine-inning game.

Sensational stuff. As I remember it, his 'stuff' that day was nothing short of out of this world. Watching Strasburg last night, I found myself thinking, 'In my mind, Woods's 'stuff' was actually better, can that be true? Or am I imagining it?'

Naturally, only one way to find out. Let's check the footage out!
(God bless the Internet!)

Quick digression. Remember that 'Friends' episode where a manic Alec Baldwin, giving a hint way back then as to his comedic potential, was running around calling everything the 'best I have ever seen'?



Well, isn't that just the best 'stuff' you have ever seen? I mean come on! Cartoon artists couldn't draw better sweeping curveballs. Look at the break on some of those pitches, insane!

To me, and really there is no need to compare last night and that night way back then but let's do it anyway, to me Wood's fifth start was actually even better than the Washington rookie's. Hey, there's absolutely no shame in fourteen strikeouts, even if it was against the Pirates, however just watch that video again and tell me Wood wasn't just that little bit more special, that night against Houston.

On a related side note, here's hoping that Kerry Wood and his subsequent stuttering, semi-broken career stand as a lighthouse of warning to Washington. Here's hoping they handle Strasburg with kid gloves and we get to enjoy him for many years to come.

Not just a couple of sensational starts.

World Cup cheat sheet for Americans: Version 5.0 - the 2010 World Cup

It’s the greatest tournament, the single greatest sporting event in the World. Bar none

There will probably be more Americans watching it than ever before, so now seems as good a time as any to keep this tradition up. Before the last World Cup in 2006 Boston Irish came up with the idea to match each World Cup team with a US sports team, the idea being this would make it easier for US viewers, possibly new to ‘soccer football’, to watch the tournament.

Since then Boston Irish has been looking after it’s people, producing the following pieces in order to help those of you in the States enjoy the game of ‘soccer football’ that little bit extra.

• 2008 European Championships cheat sheet for Americans
• 2007/2008 EPL cheat sheet
• 2007 Champions League Final 'player cheat sheet'
• 2006 World Cup cheat sheet for Americans

Hey, if it aint broke, and if people have started copying it, why stop now? Without Freddy Adu, the 2010 Boston Irish World Cup cheat sheet for el Americanos!

Group A

South Africa
For South Africa we give you, the 1999 Chicago Bulls. FIFA have done their best to ensure the hosts, South Africa, enjoy a fruitful first round, putting them in with a very poor European side, an inconsistent South American side and a really weak North American side (Mexico are going to be bullied off the park). South Africa has home field, a weak group, several skillful and quick players (Steven Pienaar of Everton probably the pick of the litter) and a decent head coach in Carlos Alberto Parreira. One small problem. Like the ’99 Bulls, South Africa has a serious problem scoring the ball. They simply can’t find the back of the net. In ’99 the Bulls made history as the single lowest scorers in NBA post shot clock history. South Africa could go the entire World Cup without scoring a goal. With Benni McCarthy listed as your ‘star man’, It is not completely out of the question.


Mexico
Mexico is in for a rough ride this summer. The three teams they face in the group stages are all big, physical, sides, or the antithesis of Mexico. It's a shame as Mexico is a decent side, they play some pretty passing football and will be enjoyable to watch. They will be severely handicapped however by their physical liabilities. In short they are going to be bullied off the park. Meet the '04/’05 Indianapolis Colts, bullied off the turf by the Patriots in the playoffs. The Colts went to Gillette Stadium with high hopes, and left with nothing but bruised bodies and egos as they Patriots punched them in the mouth all day long. South Africa, France and in particular Uruguay should all possess too much physicality for a very small Mexican side.


Uruguay
Big, tough, physical side that is happy to mix it up with the opposition any time of the day. This Uruguay side has a couple of decent players like Diego Forlan but their spine is built on hard, physical play, much like their predecessors at previous World Cups. Their leader is Diego Lugano, a player who will be walking a tight rope all tournament long with the referees. For Lugano, just think Bill Laimbeer, for Uruguay, think the Detroit Piston teams of the 1980s. You almost feel sorry for poor little Mexico. They are in for one serious mugging.

France
Amazingly the French supporters and French sporting media actually think they have a chance to win this tournament. This in spite of the fact they had to cheat to get past a very ordinary Irish side in the playoffs. France has a couple of big names and a great history, and that's about it. Their coach is a complete clown of head scratchingly bad proportions and their team spirit is completely non existent. They are a hollow shell of a team, they are the Tony Romo led Dallas Cowboys. All style and zero substance, they will fall short just like Romo and his merry band.



Group B
Argentina
A team that is expected to do great things by its fan base. A team that has the single best active player in the world today. A team that has a coach that will be sacked possibly before the team gets home. Wait, are we talking about the 2010 Cleveland Cavaliers or Argentina? Much like LeBron, Lionel Messi won't be able to win the trophy on his own. For Mike Brown read Diego Maradona. Completely and utterly tactically clueless, the team would probably go further into the tournament with a drunken, learning disabled chimpanzee at the rudder. At least he wouldn't run his car over a journalist.

I am completely sane I will have you know!!

Nigeria
All out attack, no defence, Nigeria better take their chances when they come or they will be going home early. The ‘Super Eagles’ are absolutely stacked up top with plenty of attacking options like Yakubu, Martins and Odemwingie. The problem is they have no clue how to stop the opposition scoring too. They are the current Golden State Warriors, the NBA’s second top scorers at 109 points a game. Both they and Gold State are going home empty handed due to an inability to stop the opposition from scoring.

Korea Republic
During qualification the Koreans faced the likes of Australia, Saudi Arabia, Iran and Japan in the Asian qualifying stage for the 2010 World Cup. In the third round, Korea met North Korea, Jordan and Turkmenistan. Not exactly the ‘cream of the crop’ of World football. They are the current Baltimore Orioles. Like the ‘Os in the AL East, Korea are Over matched, under staffed and out of their depth. Baltimore are currently riding a six run losing streak, Korea will lose just the three times, and then head on home.


Greece
Oh dear, this is about to get ugly. Watching Greece play football is a painful experience. They have absolutely no interest in playing creative, attacking football, instead committing themselves to fouling, cheating and boring the opposition to death. Does cheating sound harsh? Just wait until they start flopping and diving in front of you on TV, you will end up using words stronger than cheating. Ladies and gentlemen, Greece are your ’97-’04 LA Lakers, the greatest team flop artists of all time. The Lakers of that era had two of the top ten ‘floppers’ in NBA history, Robert Horry and Derek Fisher. The latter of whom great flop artist Vlad Divac said, "I think he does a better job of that [flopping] than I do." If you hate flopping, or diving as it is called in soccer, you should probably avoid watching Greece this summer, they will only annoy the living crap out of you. Trust me, there is zero entertainment value at all to be had watching the Greeks play soccer.

Group C
England
As we get closer to the tournament, the hype in England is reaching fever pitch. English fans, pundits and bookies all think they actually have a shot at winning the World Cup. This in spite of woeful recent friendly results, and a lack of real quality throughout their squad. England are the ’10 Orlando Magic. Everyone thought Orlando would at least make the finals, as most in England firmly believe their side will to. Only problem is no one told their opposition. England have a couple of good role players and are a physically ‘big’ side, but lack that final touch of class in and around the box (Dwight Howard, anyone?). They will cruise through the first round (or regular season in the Magic’s case) and then will be the victim of an untimely exit against a simply better foe.

United States
Relatively young, very athletic, huge potential. We could be talking about either USA or The current Oklahoma Thunder. The States are a very fit, very athletic side that will cause all sorts of problems for teams not ready to run for the full 90 minutes. They play nice, attractive passing football and will be involved in some exciting, high scoring games, just like the Thunder in the NBA. The States will be competitive into the latter rounds but will eventually come to their demise against bigger, more physical and more tactically astute sides.


Algeria
They really shouldn’t be here, Egypt is a superior side in every way but Algeria snuck past them and into the cup. Not the best team from their own continent (which is actually Egypt). Much like the New York Jets, not the best team in the AFC East but went further than the Patriots did last season. Side note, Algeria are absolutely brutal. England should hammer them and the States should beat them handily enough.

Slovenia
A defensive minded team who conceded only six goals in twelve qualification matches. Funny fact, their goalkeeper’s surname is, naturally, Handanovic! Handy! Slovenia would have slipped into the Cup completely unnoticed but for a stunning playoff win against everyone’s dark horse, Russia. The ‘Soviets’ were loaded with talent and primed for an interesting cup run. Now it is Slovenia’s turn to play the proverbial dark horse. Very specific one this, the Phoenix Suns of May 26th 2010. They had just got the series back to 2-2 with the Lakers and from that point on were absolute dark horses. They could have won the next two and gone on to run past the Celtics in the finals. As it was, they fell to the Lakers, as it will probably be, Slovenia will lose to England and the USA. However, right now, it is very hard to predict, you know, on account of them being such dark horses.

Group D
Germany
In the States most sports fans know what the Ewing Theory is. In Europe and the rest of the World it’s still an unknown description of a phenomenon. However, it could very well be applied beautifully here. First of all, to its creator, Bill ‘The Sports Guy’ Simmons for a definition of ‘The Ewing Theory’ taken from this piece.

What's the best example of the Ewing Theory?
That's easy. During the '99 NBA Playoffs, Ewing tore an Achilles tendon during the second game of the Eastern finals against Indiana. With Ewing finished for the playoffs and nobody else on the Knicks who could handle Rik Smits, the series seemed like a foregone conclusion. As an added bonus, since Ewing himself was involved, that made this the ultimate test of the Ewing Theory; in fact, I e-mailed Dave that week to say, "This is the greatest test yet."
Dave's return e-mail oozed with confidence, as he told me in no uncertain terms, "Ewing's injury is the best thing that ever could have happened to the Knicks -- they're definitely making the Finals now."
So what happened? The Knicks won three of the next four and advanced to the NBA Finals for only the second time in 26 years

How does this apply to Germany? If you haven’t already guessed, Germany’s talismanic Captain and resident Matt Damon look alike, Michael Ballack, is out of the World Cup due to injury. And boom goes the dynamite. Germany? The ’99 New York Knicks. Like the Knicks, they will probably fall short after a better than expected tournament.



Australia
The Soccaroos managed a totally unexpected, sparkling World Cup in '06, winning over hearts and minds with some committed, exciting football. Here they are again in '10 and, it’s basically the same squad. The same players, four years later, are going to be asked to perform miracles one more time. The problem is, they have got old in a hurry. The San Antonio Spurs were by far the oldest NBA team this season, with an average age of 30.6. Australia will be one of the oldest teams in the World Cup. Neither will be taking home any silverware in 2010.

Serbia
Dark horses, but unlike Slovenia, dark horses with a legitimate chance to get deep into the tournament. The Butler Bulldogs stunned much of the basketball world in March by making it all the way to the NCAA final. They knocked off Kansas and Michigan on the way to the finals. The Serbs have beaten France and Romania in qualification, and are stacked with little known but solid players. Vidic, the Manchester United defender, typifies their no nonsense, talented style. Serbia are going to 'shock' the World by winning Group D, and from there, like Butler, anything is possible.

Go Serbia! No, wait, I mean, Go Butler!!

Ghana
They are going to really miss Michael Essien. No Ewing theory here, they are just going to miss the midfield dynamo. Much like the 2009 Boston Celtics, who could not progress through the playoffs without Kevin Garnett. Tricky group actually, the more you look at it. Germany will be very tough to beat even without Ballack, Serbia are better than everybody knows and the Australians and Ghana are no push overs. Tough group, the Group of Death Lite.

Group E
Netherlands
This could end up as one of those situation when, as the dust settles, everyone murmurs to themselves, 'well, they really were that good, maybe we should have known'. The 2010 Duke Blue Devils went into the NCAA final against Butler with a very large proportion of people thinking Duke was going to get beaten. In fact, all tournament long, people were picking holes in Duke's game. They very quietly went ahead and won it all. Holland is absolutely stacked with talent. Their squad is positively dripping with stars. Van Persie, Van Bommell, the brilliant Wesley Sneijder, the superb Arjen Robben. They are potentially so good that we may end up waking up the day after the World Cup final thinking, 'huh, should have guessed that outcome!'

Denmark
The Portland Jail Blazers! Starring Nicholas Bendtner (see below picture!) as Rasheed Wallace, if Wallace took his pants down in public more often. Stories of the drunken carousing of the wonderful old 80's Danish teams will have no doubt made an impression on their new version. Hopefully Denmark 2.0 are up to the challenge!



Japan

Oh God, I don't know, we're not going to remember them at all, trust me, they are not going to be around long, so shall we randomly say, the 1992 New England Patriots. Before Brady, before Bledsoe, no discernible features. Fine, that's it so.

Cameroon
We’re going to use a player for this one. The best years may be behind Cameroon. They will possibly win a few games, however their age will eventually catch up with them. Kind of like Ken Griffey Jnr. They both gave us lots of memories, never won a title and are now just too old to keep up with the competition. On a somewhat related note, sad to see Griffy retire, such a classy guy and such a classy player to boot. It's a real shame it's not him leading the charts in home runs all time, instead of the current steroid infested incumbent.

Group F
Italy
One of the best defensive sides in the World, even now, four years after defending the cup to death in 2006. With their team built around the strong core of Buffon, Cannavaro and Chiellini, Italy are set to bore us all to death again, sadly. There is no denying though, how excellent a defensive team they are. Italy are the Boston Celtics in the Orlando series in this season’s NBA playoffs. They will throttle several teams to death with effective, stifling defence. Much like the Celtics, both veteran, savvy defensive sides, it remains to be seen if the outcome will be positive.

Paraguay
As Homer Simpson would say about Moe’s chili at the chili fair, ‘A bland, timid entry…’ There’s no doubting Paraguay's collective defensive ability, the team conceded just 16 goals in 18 matches during WC qualification. The problem for them is they don't score many and will suffer against quality sides who pass the ball well. By the time the tournament is over, 50% of fans world wide will forget they were ever involved. Kind of like the Houston Astros. Is there a more bland, timid entry in the majors right now than Houston?

New Zealand
This lot are in for a serious trashing. It wouldn't be a shock if they lost all their games, potentially by wide margins. They are lacking in technical ability, lacking in competitive fixtures against quality sides and finally lacking in depth throughout their squad. They will be right up there as potentially the worst team in the tournament, or the NCAA team the Arkansas Pine Bluff, beaten by 30 points in the first round of March Madness earlier this year.

Slovakia
Quick! Name three Slovakian players! Don’t worry, not many people can. The San Diego Padres of the World Cup, a team distinctly lacking in star power. Much like people can only name Adrian Gonzalez as a Padre, Martin Skrtel of Liverpool is probably the most ‘visible’ Slovak. They are blessed with a relatively easy group and thus may make it to the second round, but after that they will be knocked out and back into anonymity.

...a rare famous Padre

Group G
Brazil
Either of two options here, Brazil are either the 2008 or 2009 LA Lakers. We won’t know until the latter stages. If they are the ’08 Lakers, they will get deep into the tournament and then get ousted by a more physical, gritty, possibly European team. If they are the ’09 Lakers, they will sweep all before them. On a side note, this is the first World Cup where I will be actively rooting against Brazil. I have simply had enough of their aggressive religious recruiting. It’s disgusting.

Korea DPR
Oh boy, talk about in the wrong place at the wrong time. English soccer pundits have some great words for bad beatings, one of myself and my Dad’s favourites is ‘Tonking’, as in, ‘Korea are in for a real tonking’. We’re talking ’62 New York Mets level here. Korea are completely out of their depth in the Group of Death elect. Several tonkings ahead.

Côte d'Ivoire
The Ivory Coast were unlucky to be drawn in the ‘Group of death’ They will not fear anyone though with a talented squad that includes the likes of Didier Drogba, Salomon Kalou, Gervinho, Aruna Dindane, Amara Diane and Bakari Kone. There is a very real possibility that the Ivory Coast could blaze a brand new trail for African football and get further into the World Cup tournament than ever before. Just think of them as the Post ABA-NBA Merger San Antonio Spurs, who in 1999 became the first (and to date, the only) former ABA team to win a NBA Championship. Seriously, the Ivory Coast are they good, potentially.

Portugal
Keep an eye on this situation, it could get ugly. Portugal has all the pedigree, several star players and an ego that would make Burt Reynolds blush. Only problem is, they aren't very good. They struggled mightily to even qualify for the World Cup, and now find themselves in the Group of Death with Brazil and the Ivory Coast. Portugal has a weak team spirit, in part caused by two massive narcissists in Nani and Ronaldo. Watch these guys dissolve like a tablet in water as they get knocked out early, a case of 25 cabs for 25 guys, Portugal are the Roger Clemens era Boston Red Sox.



Group H
Spain
Oh God, it's happening again..

This team has swept all before them. They are potentially the greatest side of all time. They are loaded at every position. They score for fun and have the ability to absolutely destroy any opposition. They are the best team in the World. Wait, are we talking about Spain, or the amazing '07/'08 New England Patriots? Here's where it gets scary if you are a Spanish fan. The Patriots were seemingly invincible. They swept everything before them on the way to the Superbowl, there they were shocked by the defensive minded Giants. Spain are without argument the greatest team in the World. The World Cup, though, is like the ocean to a sailor, a cruel mistress, and often drowns the best team elect in a sea of drama and upsets. Who's to say Lionel Messi won't take the tournament by storm, or worse yet for Spain, a defensive minded Italian team peaks at the right time? The Patriots that lost the big game in Arizona are Spain's best equivalent, and worst nightmare combined.



Switzerland
The 2010 Kansas NCAA basketball team. They will beat the cupcakes(s) in round one, and get knocked out against a decent team in round 2. No substance whatsoever as illustrated by poor recent results against the likes of Finland, Norway and Luxembourg. Going home early, like Kansas.

Honduras
They are grouped with the best team in the World and their goalkeeper, Noel Valladares, is known for making mistakes at crucial moments. This is not a good omen. Meet the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Honduras is going to lose all three games and potentially lose them by big margins. Possibly the worst team in the tournament. Their match against Spain, if the Spaniards are on their game, could possibly end up a double figure scoreline. Their only consolation will be they only play three games, unlike the poor Buccaneers who had to suffer through fourteen.

Go Buccs!

Chile
The 2001 Carolina Panthers! They will one single solitary game, and then go home. Carolina beat the Vikings and then went 0-15 the rest of the season. Chile will beat Honduras, get walloped by Spain and lose a closer one to Switzerland. Overall outcome? One win each.

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The not so perfect game

So you thought you had a bad night, eh? Imagine waking up in Jim Joyce’s shoes!

Shocking finale to young Tigers hurler Armando Galarraga’s attempt at perfection last night. If you haven’t seen it already, what should have been the final play of the game unfurled as such;

‘’ Donald hit a grounder in the hole between first and second, Cabrera fielded it and threw to first, where Galarraga caught the ball at least a step ahead of Donald, replays showed.’’

Sadly, the ‘blue’ on the play called the runner safe. Bye bye, perfect game.

The official, Jim Joyce, to his credit, has come out and said he made the wrong call. According to Curt Schilling on ESPN, Joyce is one of the better umpires, and that appears to be the word coming from most media entities this morning. Joyce has said sorry and should be, but of course won’t be, exempt from further blame.

The real issue is the power, the sway that Major League umpires hold over the game of baseball. They would appear to actually think that they are part of the reason that Joe Punter forks over $50 to go watch a baseball game. They would appear to believe they are part of the attraction. This has been the case lately where ‘Cowboy’ Joe West has called out Boston and New York for playing slow games, when the irony is it is his letter box sized, tiny strike zone that is the main cause of same. This was the case where both west and also Bill Hohn recently tossed pitchers early in the game in entirely disproportionate reactions to perceived injustices on the part of the pitchers.

This behaviour should not be a shock to anyone, it has been going on for years now. The incidents just appear to be happening at a faster rate now, and in higher profile situations. The bottom line is, the ‘blue’ has become as big if not bigger than the game, and until Major League Baseball tackles this ridiculous situation, problems like this are going to reoccur over and over.

An interesting side-note to last nights attempt at perfection. The first thing I thought when I saw the play was, considering the situation and the context, shouldn’t Joyce have called the runner out? This would have been a ‘baseball decision’ for want of a better phrase, and pretty much everyone would have gone home happy. The Tigers would have their deserved win, Armando would have had his deserved perfect game, and the Indians would not have complained too much as one hit does not a game make.

ESPN have asked the exact same question and the results are fairly conclusive, most would agree Joyce should have called the runner out even if it had been a ‘tie’ at first base.

The top ten most enjoyable rivalries in sports

With the Celtics about to meet the Lakers in what some feel is the greatest rivalry in sports, it seems only right to look at Boston Irish's top ten most enjoyable sporting rivalries, worldwide. Often if you get someone from Europe picking the list you get tennis, motor sports, soccer and cricket. if it's someone from the States you get obscure college rivalries and NASCAR. The answer to the question 'What are the top ten most enjoyable rivalries in sports?' lies, as always, somewhere in between.

Ground rules:
Most Individual sports don't count. Two bratty, spoiled tennis stars feuding on the court? No interest. If there aren't hundreds of thousands of fans motivated by the rivalry, it doesn’t count. There are of course exceptions. Disclaimer: This is of course just one blog's opinion. That's the beauty of sports lists. Disagree? Make your own!



The top ten most enjoyable rivalries in sport

10. Muhammad Ali v Joe Frazier
Starting, naturally, with the exception to the rule. Way back when, in a time when heavyweight boxing was still important, these guys went head to head three times. Two of those events were considered among the greatest, if not the greatest fights of all time. Boxing enthusiasts often call their first fight at Madison Square Garden in 1971 the most 'significant' boxing match in history. Their third fight, "The Thrilla in Manila" is the stuff of lore. This selection is tinged with nostalgia, as boxing, to me anyway, is dead at the moment. It's lost something. I remember staying up late for the big fights, Foreman, Tyson, Lewis, Bruno. There was something of a charm and a class to those fights. Today? Nothing. Boxing has no pulse. Muhammad Ali v Joe Frazier? The stuff of legend.



9. Inter Milan v AC Milan
There is atmosphere, and then there is atmosphere. The depth of passion and history in this rivalry is astonishing. Italian league football has lost a little of its gloss lately, lagging behind La Liga and the Premiership, but any meeting between these two old giants is worth tuning in for.



8. Giants v Dodgers
Every time you see a game between these two, you can feel the mutual hatred in the stands and on the field. In this day and age of multi millionaire playboy players, that's pretty rare. Kind of nice to see actual sporting animosity still alive and well in this rivalry. Of all the rivalries here, do Dodgers and Giants fans hate each other more than anyone else? Even more so than Boston/New York for example?

7. Celtic v Rangers
The 'Old Firm' derby has been diluted somewhat by over exposure to each other, however when gameday comes around, this is one of the most fiercely contested sporting events in the world. Consider this, US readers who are wondering why namby pamby college A against hauty tauty college B isn't in this list. It is actually dangerous, physically dangerous, for a Celtic fan to be at Ibrox, or a Rangers fan to be at Parkhead. You would be literally taking your life in your hands.

'The Old Firm rivalry fuels many assaults and many deaths on Old Firm Derby days; an activist group that monitors sectarian activity in Glasgow has reported that on Old Firm weekends, admissions to hospital emergency rooms increase ninefold over normal levels, and journalist Franklin Foer noted that in the period from 1996 to 2003, eight deaths in Glasgow were directly linked to Old Firm matches, and hundreds and thousands of assaults'

Celtic v Rangers is so much more than just a football match - it's a clash of religion, politics and opposing social attitudes. It's war.

6. India v Pakistan
You want a global level rivalry, a rivalry of potentially nuclear proportions? I give you India v Pakistan. Since the creation of Pakistan by the Partition of India in 1947, cricket on the subcontinent has been a hairs width from causing international incidents on several occasions. I witnessed a small cross section of this on a trip to India a few years ago.

So for those of you following at home, India have arrived in Pakistan for their massive showdown. I have seen Red Sox v Yankees. I have seen Sunderland v Newcastle, the Manchester Derby, Ireland v England in all sports. They are all an episode of the Tellytubbies on a Saturday Morning compared to this in terms of intensity. I don’t know how many guys I saw carrying cricket bats with them today, clutching them like they would be able to help India win from here. In a country with whatever, 1 billion people, it is literally all anyone wants to talk about. It actually nearly proved the catalyst towards the first conversation between my driver and I. I’ll get back to that. On a somber note, but just to give some idea of how big this game is over here, the atrocity in Madrid was a very, very poor second to the game on the front page of the newspapers. If it hadn’t been for CNN in the hotel I would hardly have known what happened actually, showing just how far away and just how different a place this is. Same way I imagine we would turn something of a blind eye to something of that magnitude happening here in Delhi.

5. Sunderland v Newcastle
Often called the Tyne–Wear derby, this makes North Carolina/Duke look like a picnic in the park between friends. These two groups of fans hate each other like there is no tomorrow. Sunderland, for years, were sort of the 'Rebel Alliance' to Newcastle's mighty Empire. However, then Newcastle went and got themselves relegated and spent last season in the division below the Premiership. They are back up again and the two showdowns between the two North Eastern giants in '10/'11 will be as bloodthirsty as always. Perhaps more so than ever before, come to think of it, with Sunderland now built with a spine of steel in the form of Lorik Cana and Lee Cattermole, two of the most committed midfield players in the league. Combine Newcastle's Alan Smith and the odds on a red card in these two fixtures would have to be 1/2 or lower. Sunderland and Newcastle fans would settle for a mid table finish next year if you were to guarantee they would beat their rival. That's literally all they want.



4. Red Sox v Yankees
This rivalry literally exploded back into life in the early part of this decade. So much has happened in the last ten years alone you could write a 1,000 page book on the subject (and plenty have tried!). Joe West might not like it, but Boston/New York is juicy, super juicy. Think about it. All the Pedro Martinez stuff, Don Zimmer taking a dive, Carl Everett breaking up Mike 'Moose' Mussina's perfect game at Fenway, Karim Garcia and Aaron Boone, the whole A-Rod thing, Jason Varitek showing A-Rod who is boss, Johnny Damon, Gary Sheffield fighting with Boston fans and The Mitchell report and the nine Yankees appearing on it.

Then 2004 happened.

Boston coming back from 0-3 down. Dave Robert's steal. Curt Schilling pitching on one leg. David Ortiz's walk off hits. Johnny Damon again.

This isn't as much a rivalry, as an insane melo drama packed to bursting with story lines. Long may it continue..




3. Patriots v Colts
The greatest current rivalry in the NFL, one of the greatest of all time. Polian v Kraft, Dungy v Bilichek, Brady v Manning. The Colts may have the upper hand at the moment, but all Brady has to do is wave his hand with the three shiny Superbowl rings on it in the direction of Manning with his one, and the argument is done. For now.




2. Barcelona v Real Madrid
El Clásico. A match so good, so big, you just crack open a beer, sit back and let it wash over you. This has everything, history, drama and passion. This season's sensational La Liga campaign saw Barcelona and Real Madrid quite literally battle over the title to the final day of the season. It was enthralling, and their late season derby match was absolutely compelling drama. Real Madrid will re-stock over the summer, and bring in more high priced talent while Barcelona look as if they are going to be able to coax their prodigal son Cesc Fabregas home again. Next season could be even more dramatic.

1. Celtics v Lakers
Such a colourful clash of cultures, styles and characters. You had the Showtime Lakers vs. blue-collar Boston in the '80s which was basketball at its best. Now we have the rivalry reborn in '08 and this season, '10, and it feels as dramatic as ever. New characters, same enormous clash of styles. You really get a feeling as a fan that these guys do not like each other, and in this day and age of pampered sports stars, that's kind of nice.

The top ten most enjoyable rivalries in sports

• Muhammad Ali v Joe Frazier
• Inter Milan v AC Milan
• Giants v Dodgers
• Celtic v Rangers
• India v Pakistan
• Sunderland v Newcastle
• Red Sox v Yankees
• Patriots v Colts
• Barcelona v Real Madrid
• Celtics v Lakers

World Cup fever: Previous 'cheat sheets' for Americans

Boston Irish is currently working on its 'Cheat sheet for Americans' for the 2010 World Cup. We started this back in 2006 and have come up with the following since. Enjoy.

• 2008 European Championships cheat sheet for Americans
• 2007/2008 EPL cheat sheet
• 2007 Champions League Final 'player cheat sheet'
• 2006 World Cup cheat sheet for Americans

You guys got any balls?

Baseballs are hard to come by in Ireland. Even in the Irish baseball league, believe it or not. The last two games the Dublin Hurricanes have played the home teams have supplied a total of eight baseballs for the two games (it's up to the home team to provide balls in Irish league play).

After a little bit of rain and wet turf, after a few dozen foul balls, grounders and what not, the balls end up looking like this.


Wet, heavy baseballs are zero fun to throw. They are possibly even less fun to hit. Basically they are no fun at all.

Maybe you are a high school coach in Arizona. Maybe you are a college assistant coach in Idaho reading this. Maybe you are connected to a Major League club. Either way, if you have balls, we in Irish baseball need them. Game used would be fine. Anything at all that is still basically functional, because, right now, Irish baseball has no balls. Send us anything you got!

A beautiful baseball

That's what I said. Irish baseball has no balls.



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